Yeah I am the one who said I needed more chapters. But I may need to work what I need into existing chapters or cut down the number of new chapters.
A friend at Liberty States Fiction Writers (LSFW) offered a possible lead with an agent. Never shrug at such an opportunity.
Got useful comments from yesterday's session of LSFW and I signed up for next month's conference.
Right now people really like the sections with Satchel Dan. He's a character that requires restraint though. He's best as a sort of wise, loud-mouthed commentator. Too much of that can get annoying and you get tired of the character.
Here's a sample:
“Look out boys,” Satchel Dan said. “Here comes the smartest negro on
A taller man, equally ancient as Satchel Dan, saluted with a flaring hand.
“Yes sir, General Randall Toussaint has taken the field,” the man said in a rafter-shaking bass. “Praise God, our savior has come home!”
“Randall? Is it gonna rain tomorrow?” asked a heavyset man in a soft baritone. Full grinning cheeks hid his decades of standing at the corner. “Is the rain coming, Randall? Is it? I mean, being how you know everything about everything, I thought I’d ask.”
“C’mon now speak up, boy,” Satchel Dan said impatiently. “Tell us what tomorrow will bring. In Randall Toussaint we trust, right? Right?”
Randall’s eyelids drew down tightly. “Why are you in my face, old man?”
“Well you did call us broke, vagrant…vagrant, um–”
“Stank alley cats!” interjected the pudgy baritone.