Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Latest revision almost done

I will have the updated Heritage Fields up on Google Docs this evening. As mentioned before, I've added a new chapter 12. Trying very hard to only tinker with the later passages my wonderful, amazing volunteer readers have not gotten to yet. :-)

A story with multiple threads can spin out of control if you let too many ideas crop up. This latest edit is about weaving together some loose ends.

Hapsburg is a tricky place.

I must say, certain characters have surprised me during these tweaks. You never know when a seemingly one-off character will evolve into something more. Compared with my original idea . . . I'll save the genesis of this story for a later day.

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Flame and Bone

When I was made from fire
Poured into the tender vessel of caution
That keeps my smoke from rising
Quickly did I discover that apart from crisp drizzles or falling snow
The world chilled my touched
Walking the narrow cornered gap between girders and cut stone
One learns to tuck his shoulders in or risk
Jostling a neighbor passing by rapt with want
For a clear path without the distraction
Of another man's boiling eyes
The tip of a finger
That oldest of all weapons
Grown deadlier and pristine in its invention
Gathers a mote of a cinder on its bare flesh
And turns pondering how best to scratch the impious itch
Prying open the tender seam
Where the oil of thought dews
Offering a new wick to ignite
Squirming alive as a salamander of mischief
That yearns for a taste of air it is so ready to devour
The steam of breath betrays me
Before the glint of orange spreads
In popping bright waves
Eroding the fibers feeding it
Leaving naught but ash
As my shell of quietude falls away